Tag: Tower of Joy

Hey Dany during her wedding that that if Daario had loved her he would have taken her at sword point like Rhaegar took Lyanna. That implies that she does believe that Rhaegar kidnapped Lyanna rather than running off with her but she still seems to have a high opinion of her brother that doesn’t seem to me can you explain it?

Well, this has to do with the idea of abduction as a trope in chivalric romance. In these stories, there really wasn’t a big difference between “running off with her” and “kidnapping.” Whether it’s Lancelot and Guinevere or Tristan and Iseult of chivalric romances, or the earlier Celtic sources whether Welsh or Irish (there’s a very similar story that’s part of the legend of Finn Mac Cool), the lady is married and is carried off by the knight against the wishes of her husband (hence why it’s called abduction/kidnapping and not elopment). 

Moreover, in a lot of these stories, there are very weird parallels between the very-much-married lady being kidnapped by a mysterious knight and spirited off to a strange castle in the Land of Summer or the Twisted Woods – and if all of this is starting to sound a lot like Faerie, you’re not wrong – from which she is rescued by the gallant knight (which is the spark for their falling in forbidden love) and the lady being rescued by the gallant knight from her husband’s wrath when the adultery is discovered, and spirited off to another castle, which is equally strange.

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To bring this around to Rhaegar and Lyanna, the name of the castle that Lancelot takes Guinevere back to is Joyous Gard/Joyeuse Garde. Gard/garde means a keep, a keep is a fortified tower, and thus we get the Tower of Joy. However, Joyous Gard has a deeper significance than just the name: in the beginning of the story, it’s known as Dolorous Gard because the castle has been put under an evil enchantment; Lancelot takes the castle and breaks the spell, but finds within the castle a tomb with his name on it, and knows that he is going to be buried there one day. When Guinevere visits his castle – at a time when she’s still with Arthur and Lancelot and Guinevere are holding to a chaste romance – Lancelot changes the name of the castle to Joyous Gard in her honor. When Lancelot and Guinevere give in to their passion and their adultery is discovered, the castle becomes Dolorous Gard again, suggesting a Fisher King-like situation where the purity of chaste love has become the impurity of carnal love, dooming the land just as their adultery has caused the fall of Camelot, even as the castle becomes the refuge of the lady and her knight. 

The point is there’s a lot of doubling: the good knight and the evil knight, the lady fair and the adulterous queen, the good castle and the evil castle, and thus (to get all the way back to your ask) the kidnapper and the rescuer. 

Why on Earth would House Dayne name their future lord after Ned Stark? Not only did Ned (well, technically Howland Reed) kill their most famous family member, but they also seem to hold him responsible for Ashara’s suicide. I can see them collaborating with him to keep R+L=J a secret (possibly out of respect for Ser Arthur’s memory), but how could they ever bring themselves to *like* him?

Gee, I wonder how tragic deaths might have brought two grieving families together?

Prince
…Capulet! Montague!
See, what a scourge is laid upon your hate,
That heaven finds means to kill your joys with love.
And I for winking at your discords too
Have lost a brace of kinsmen: all are punish’d.
Capulet
O brother Montague, give me thy hand:
This is my daughter’s jointure, for no more
Can I demand.
Montague
But I can give thee more:
For I will raise her statue in pure gold;
That while Verona by that name is known,
There shall no figure at such rate be set
As that of true and faithful Juliet.
Capulet
As rich shall Romeo’s by his lady’s lie;
Poor sacrifices of our enmity!
Prince
A glooming peace this morning with it brings…

(Incidentally, don’t really agree that they blame him for her suicide. It’s more complicated than that.)

Here’s how I think it went down: 

  1. Ned and Ashara were lovers at Harrenhal – after all, they’re both young, neither of them are betrothed to anyone, so there’s no dishonor as Harwin tells us. Indeed, Ned may have even asked for Ashara’s hand or been in the process of negotiations for a betrothal – he’s the second son of a Great House, she comes from a Lesser House but an ancient one, no one’s an heir so that’s less of an issue, it’s a good match – when Lyanna disappears and Brandon rides to King’s Landing.
  2. The young couple are divided by civil war – his father and brother have been murdered and his sister’s abducted, he’s running for his life, she’s looking after Elia Martell in dangerous circumstances (although GRRM says she’s not nailed down so perhaps they have time for one more reunion before he gets married), Rhaegar’s missing in scandalous circumstances. 
  3. Ashara becomes pregnant and goes home to Starfall for her lying in, except that the civil war and Ned’s forced marriage prevent the child from being born in wedlock. This is much less of an issue in Dorne, remember. She has a stillbirth. 
  4. Ashara finds out that her brother is complicit in the abduction and imprisonment of the sister of the man she loves at the orders of the man who humiliated her mistress and provoked the civil war that ruined her life, when Arthur writes home asking for the family to send Wylla to the Tower of Joy because Lyanna is pregnant and needs a midwife for her secret royal baby.
  5. When it’s clear that the war is over, Ashara sends word to Ned where he can find his sister. 
  6. The fight at the Tower of Joy happens. Soon after, Ned arrives at Starfell with Dawn, his nephew, and his sister’s body. The combined grief of her stillbirth, her culpability in the death of her brother, and everything else leads Ashara to commit suicide.

At this point, think of the shared grief of the two families. Ned’s lost his father, his brother, his sister (in part because of Arthur), the woman he loves, their child, and almost all of his friends. The Daynes have lost Arthur, Ashara, and Ashara’s child. The mutual recognition of the common tragedy that has befallen them leads to reconciliation. 

After all, Ned stays in Starfall for some time, because newborn Jon isn’t about to travel. The family gets to know Ned and move past initial reactions. They see the way that he’s agreed to protect this innocent, helpless child at the expense of his own reputation, and they agree to do the whole coverup with Wylla to shield both Lyanna and the child, but also in a way to preserve the reputation of both Arthur and Ashara. 

And so the Daynes remember Ned as a tragic figure, the man who might have become their good-son/brother if it hadn’t been for the war.