Tag: eddard stark

I’ve always liked the little detail (I think it’s Bran that recalls it) of Ned bringing lower members of his household — like the castle smith or the kennel-master — to dine with his family and talk. Within Winterfell it seems like that would be a great way to stay informed and win over your subjects (but I like to believe that Ned’s virtue is the only explanation). What do you think they talked about? Do you think other Northerners knew? When did he start doing this, and how did Cat react?

 It’s Arya who remembers it. 

Back at Winterfell, they had eaten in the Great Hall almost half the time. Her father used to say that a lord needed to eat with his men, if he hoped to keep them. “Know the men who follow you,” she heard him tell Robb once, “and let them know you. Don’t ask your men to die for a stranger.” At Winterfell, he always had an extra seat set at his own table, and every day a different man would be asked to join him. One night it would be Vayon Poole, and the talk would be coppers and bread stores and servants. The next time it would be Mikken, and her father would listen to him go on about armor and swords and how hot a forge should be and the best way to temper steel. Another day it might be Hullen with his endless horse talk, or Septon Chayle from the library, or Jory, or Ser Rodrik, or even Old Nan with her stories.

Arya had loved nothing better than to sit at her father’s table and listen to them talk. (Arya II, AGOT)

As you can see from the quote, Ned talked to them about their jobs and learned a bit about their work, as part of his philosophy of enlightened paternalism.

This is something of a classic move of noble/commoner interaction; before the term “condescension” became a pejorative, the ability of a nobleman (especially a king) to be polite to the lower orders without erasing the social distance between them (such “overfamiliar” behavior, it was believed, would give rise to either contempt and the loss of aristocratic mystery or overfamiliarity and social climbing) was seen as a necessity for elite behavior. Hence, it’s something of a cliche in the U.K to write about royals pressing the flesh with their subjects and saying things like “Hello, what’s your name? And what do you do? That’s so interesting! And how long have you been a(n) ______? Jolly good!”

Ned’s better at it than that caricature, but there’s still a political motive behind his custom: from later in the chapter, “Her father used to say that a lord needed to eat with his men, if he hoped to keep them. “Know the men who follow you…and let them know you. Don’t ask your men to die for a stranger.” As I’ve said elsewhere, Ned’s person-focused theory of politics is a disadvantage when it comes to being Hand of the King, but if you look at the long run, it inspired loyalty from beyond the grave.

In terms of where he learned it, I don’t think he learned it from Jon Arryn – the Vale is far too socially conservative for that to be Jon’s M.O. Rather, I think it’s something that Ned learned from his father, that it’s part of the Starks’ unique relationship with the people of the North. I think Cat was initially scandalized, but eventually accepted as part of the Northern way. 

Why on Earth would House Dayne name their future lord after Ned Stark? Not only did Ned (well, technically Howland Reed) kill their most famous family member, but they also seem to hold him responsible for Ashara’s suicide. I can see them collaborating with him to keep R+L=J a secret (possibly out of respect for Ser Arthur’s memory), but how could they ever bring themselves to *like* him?

Gee, I wonder how tragic deaths might have brought two grieving families together?

Prince
…Capulet! Montague!
See, what a scourge is laid upon your hate,
That heaven finds means to kill your joys with love.
And I for winking at your discords too
Have lost a brace of kinsmen: all are punish’d.
Capulet
O brother Montague, give me thy hand:
This is my daughter’s jointure, for no more
Can I demand.
Montague
But I can give thee more:
For I will raise her statue in pure gold;
That while Verona by that name is known,
There shall no figure at such rate be set
As that of true and faithful Juliet.
Capulet
As rich shall Romeo’s by his lady’s lie;
Poor sacrifices of our enmity!
Prince
A glooming peace this morning with it brings…

(Incidentally, don’t really agree that they blame him for her suicide. It’s more complicated than that.)

Here’s how I think it went down: 

  1. Ned and Ashara were lovers at Harrenhal – after all, they’re both young, neither of them are betrothed to anyone, so there’s no dishonor as Harwin tells us. Indeed, Ned may have even asked for Ashara’s hand or been in the process of negotiations for a betrothal – he’s the second son of a Great House, she comes from a Lesser House but an ancient one, no one’s an heir so that’s less of an issue, it’s a good match – when Lyanna disappears and Brandon rides to King’s Landing.
  2. The young couple are divided by civil war – his father and brother have been murdered and his sister’s abducted, he’s running for his life, she’s looking after Elia Martell in dangerous circumstances (although GRRM says she’s not nailed down so perhaps they have time for one more reunion before he gets married), Rhaegar’s missing in scandalous circumstances. 
  3. Ashara becomes pregnant and goes home to Starfall for her lying in, except that the civil war and Ned’s forced marriage prevent the child from being born in wedlock. This is much less of an issue in Dorne, remember. She has a stillbirth. 
  4. Ashara finds out that her brother is complicit in the abduction and imprisonment of the sister of the man she loves at the orders of the man who humiliated her mistress and provoked the civil war that ruined her life, when Arthur writes home asking for the family to send Wylla to the Tower of Joy because Lyanna is pregnant and needs a midwife for her secret royal baby.
  5. When it’s clear that the war is over, Ashara sends word to Ned where he can find his sister. 
  6. The fight at the Tower of Joy happens. Soon after, Ned arrives at Starfell with Dawn, his nephew, and his sister’s body. The combined grief of her stillbirth, her culpability in the death of her brother, and everything else leads Ashara to commit suicide.

At this point, think of the shared grief of the two families. Ned’s lost his father, his brother, his sister (in part because of Arthur), the woman he loves, their child, and almost all of his friends. The Daynes have lost Arthur, Ashara, and Ashara’s child. The mutual recognition of the common tragedy that has befallen them leads to reconciliation. 

After all, Ned stays in Starfall for some time, because newborn Jon isn’t about to travel. The family gets to know Ned and move past initial reactions. They see the way that he’s agreed to protect this innocent, helpless child at the expense of his own reputation, and they agree to do the whole coverup with Wylla to shield both Lyanna and the child, but also in a way to preserve the reputation of both Arthur and Ashara. 

And so the Daynes remember Ned as a tragic figure, the man who might have become their good-son/brother if it hadn’t been for the war.